Heels Down, Kick On

In the words of David Gray, ‘My, oh my.’ What an absolute little SUPERSTAR Flora was at the dressage today. She makes my heart want to burst sometimes. Other times, I want to punch her in the nose (which I would never EVER do, by the way...just so we’re clear); but today was one of those days when I think I couldn’t possibly love her any more. No, we’re not the perfect pair. I’m too soft. I can’t keep my hands in the right place. My right leg slips back. I tip forwards. She’s a bit stiff behind, opinionated to juuuuust the right side of naughtiness and, as a pair, I’m a tad too lanky for her (5’7” on a 15.3hh mare). But... We both hate dressage; yet the effort we have been putting in since the new year, actually trying to deal with our dressage demons, has been significant. And though we didn’t QUITE make the placings in our class today - which was a tough one featuring some good combinations - we did increase our percentage score (from our first ever attempt last month) by a...

Unaffiliated Prelim again, but this time, it’s the second Prelim class of the day rather than the first. Simply due to the fact we’re relying on a lift from a very helpful, lorry-owning friend, partaking in the final class of the day. And therefore, we are attempting to make the smallest nuisance of ourselves possible. Anyway, anyone who read my post after our last attempt might remember that my biggest issue was the big, fat, inevitable MEMORY LOSS 🧠❌. And that was a simple test. This one, even though it’s the same bloody level, is complex! Not in terms of the movements, just the basic route around the arena🙈. Hence, I am sitting with a Merlot, drawing silly little diagrams whilst trying to visualise the test without looking down at the paper. Like some kind of weird spiritual medium, allowing the Dressage Gods to use my unworthy, shite-at-dressage body as a vessel to communicate the test to the paper. It’s not the first time this kind of mental powercut has occurred eithe...

Putting 'carrot stretches' into a Google search reveals myriad images of successful attempts. Horses reaching into muscle-elasticating poses; contorting into others that release other parts of their anatomy. And, let's face it... why shouldn't they? How hard can it be to use a long, juicy carrot to encourage your horse to do this for the good of their physical wellbeing? Well, let me tell you. It's not that easy. I have nearly lost digits as a result of this exercise. The carrot stretch ponies of  the internet are like these Instagram stars with their own fitness pages. They're good at it, They're glam. They'll do anything for a healthy snack. They reach, gradually, into their stretch, tentatively mouthing at the yummy treat and holding the pose for long enough to feel the long term benefit. Flora, on the other hand, treats carrot stretches like a petulant child with zero resilience. She tries for mere nanoseconds. She snatches at the carrot (fa...

Today was our first ever pure dressage competition. Previously, we’ve done three dressage tests ever in our lives, but always part of a mini ODE or Arena Event. It was only a local, unaffiliated Prelim – but it still had me questioning why we do this to ourselves… it seems to me that competing with your horse is only 10% fun, and 90% a rather costly way to sh*t yourself. Allowing for the fact it’s been a full year since we went anywhere (with the exception of a show a 15 minute hack away in the summer), the stress levels were running high. I was so organised originally: we’d been practising and improving with both our lessons and ‘Project Relax’. I spent yesterday schooling, tack cleaning and boot polishing in my bathtub (tack only – I did not get in with it) and running white saddle pads through the washing machine when my husband wasn’t looking. My stuff was packed. I even wrote myself a little itinerary for the morning. Then, the alarm went off as planned at 6am. I hadn’t...

Yesterday, Flora had her first ever physio appointment. This was to make sure that the tension she carries during schooling is more... well, attitude, and not pain. At 12:30pm, we welcomed Lee Clark-Physio to the yard and introduced him to Flora, her background and her problems. Flora is a grumpy old goat. She’s not interested in you unless you know her well already, or you are brandishing a carrot. But she seemed at ease with Lee immediately, and stood quietly while he began to check her over. It became apparent very quickly that she had soreness and tension in the base of her neck, across her back and her sacroiliac region. Lee was a very good teacher, advising us to ignore her behaviour when being touched, and to watch the reaction of the muscles themselves instead. Sure enough, there was visible, involuntary spasming. And why wouldn’t there be? Make anyone do any kind of workout, particularly holding themselves in a certain position for a length of time, and there wil...

It’s been 11 days since Project Relax (or Project ‘Chill The F*ck Out as I really like to call it) began. Only 6 of those have been ‘school days’. The rest have been hacking days or (sadly) rest days, due to a little inconvenience known as ‘work’. However, I am pleased to report (in fact, I’m over the bloody moon to report) that I am genuinely seeing some progress with Flora’s work in the school.   My last post described the first session we spent schooling alone, after a lot of tension and head throwing the day before, running through a dressage test with a friend. It was a pretty successful session, with a vast improvement seen on the video recorded by Alice. The next night, we had a lesson. Our instructor let me spend a long time working Flora in in walk, just like the night before, but with more leg yielding and some turn on the forehand at the corners of some squares to encourage her to step under from the beginning. Once she was warmer and looser, we moved...

Yesterday was DAY 1 of PROJECT RELAX. Flora is naturally quite tense in the school, so since we are biting the bullet and trying to start improving our dressage, this needs sorting. After a warm up and a run through of our Prelim test at the weekend, which my friend Eli videoed, Flora’s resistance to contact reared its ugly head again, which ironically, is a perfect description of Image 1, below 🤔 . Even when she’s not obviously resisting, her jaw is clenched and she’s gener ally quite upright (Image 2). Interestingly, when we are warming up, she is happy to flop round long and low, but as soon as I shorten my reins, I tend to disappear down a hole in her back. 🤦‍♀️ She’s been checked over, had her teeth done, her bit professionally fitted and her tack changed, so it seems it’s down to a combination of my riding (makes sense) and the fact that she was trained to race, is now 14 and hasn’t done much in the way of schooling in the meantime - at least, not consistently. Sooo...